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Speaking For Myself

Ryan Egan

I’d really like to get this off my chest
Speak through these words in your hands
I find it hard to know where to begin
So I’ll just dive in

I know that I’ve been looking rather thin
Like myself but minus the chins
It’s not their drugs that eat me from within
But they don’t help either

I’ve been lying to myself through all these years
So blind, so insincere
And now any day, I'm bound to disappear
But I'm gone already

They’ll pry until my memory’s erased
Stripped like the smile from my face
So I’ll bow and let my maker lead the way
In this last dance

I could peel my heart wide open
I could dream without a crutch
But lies run deeper than an ocean
And my two feet can hardly touch

I never saw it clearer than tonight
Like a burning candle or flashlight
No paradise will greet me when I die
Just white noise

I'm guided by a voice choking on tears
He’s got orders, a promising career
Through the dark, we don’t see the puppeteer
In the final hour

Now whether I’ve been speaking for myself
Or taking cues from someone else
Just know that I will sleep right through the bells
And dream eternal

I could peel my heart wide open
I could dream without a crutch
But lies run deeper than an ocean
And my two feet can hardly touch

When my time is coming
Will you let me go
When the fire’s burning
Will you let me know

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