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Go Round Again

Benny Hill

The couple looked down at their newborn child
In their shack that was falling to bits
The mother said: Let's call it Johnny
The father said: Let's call it quits
And when Johnny was four, and his pa was too poor
To buy toys from the Christmas shop shelf
So he just fired his gun, and he told his young son
Father Christmas had shot himself

Now, one day, his ma took him to a fair
And he went on a roundabout
He giggled with glee, I wanna go wee!
Everyone heard the boy shout
She took him by the hand, from the fairground they ran
She took him behind a big tree
She said: There, shut your row, you can go wee now
He took a deep breath and went, we!

Then he said: Please, can I go 'round again, ma?
Please, can I go 'round again?
Oh, I love the sound of the merry-go-round
Ma, please let me go 'round again
I'll do all of my homework
I'll even kiss old Auntie Gwen
And I won't shout out loud, ma, I'll make you proud
Oh, please, let me go 'round again

At twelve, he danced with his gym mistress
She said: Johnny, you're wicked, and you're bad
I wish I was your ma for just half an hour
John said: I'll have a word with my dad
Then someone dropped a lit cigarette down the back
Of her dress, but she didn't shout
She just walked off the floor, and she said: What a bore
I shall just have to sit this one out

And Johnny said: Please, can we go 'round again, Miss Rhodes?
Please, can we go 'round again?
I've not been this close to a woman before
And heck knows when I will again
Oh, I tell you true, I could dance with you
Till the cows come home, and then
I could dance with the cows
So please, Miss Rhodes
Please let me go 'round again

At eighteen, Irene, with the hourglass figure
Got him in a heck of a fix
Her pa came 'round, and Johnny was found
With his hands on a quarter to six
They were married the next day in the church by the bay
10AM, the 15th of June
She looked lovely in white as she said: Johnny, tonight
He said: To heck with tonight, this afternoon!

Then can we go 'round again?
In the meantime, can we go 'round again?
I tell ya I haven't felt like this
Since I can't remember when
And seein' you lay there beside me
Oh, it damn near blows my mind
So please, can we go 'round again and again
And then 'round again one more time?

Johnny's mother-in-law came to live next door
She had a tongue that stung like a bee
She said: I'll dance on your grave, Johnny said: That's brave
'Cause I'm gonna be buried at sea
At fifty, he took to coming home late
He wasn't a creature of habit
If he came home early, his wife thought he was up to something
If he came home late, she thought that he'd had it

He was just ninety-one on the day he passed on
It was the way that he hoped it would be
He was shot by a beauty queen's husband
In a fit of jealousy
As he lay on the floor, a priest was sent for
And with his last breath, Johnny confessed
I spent all of my money on women and drink
And like a fool, I squandered the rest

Lord, can I go 'round again?
Please, can I go 'round again?
Oh, I can't believe that I'll never see
Your sky or your trees again
Oh, the girls and the wine and the living were fine
And I shouldn't complain, but then
You give damned short rides on this fairground of yours, Lord
Oh, please let me go 'round again!

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