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The Streaker's Ball

Benny Hill

Now, the whole darn town sure opened up its eyes
The night they held the Streakers Ball
There was every shape and every size
(At the Streakers Ball)
As the first girl came running in a lovely bit of stuff
Well, Charlie had a stroke, and so did Mr. Duff
I wanted one as well, but I wasn't quick enough
At the Streakers Ball

Oh, Fancy Dress tonight, and it sure was fun
(At the Streakers Ball)
Cousin Annie walked in backward as a hot crossed bun
(At the Streakers Ball)
Though he's got a wooden leg, my poor old Uncle Dick
Poured treacle on his bald head, half an inch thick
He said: I'm going as a toffee apple on a stick
To the Streakers Ball

Auntie Jean went as Godiva, and the horse cost fifty quid
(At the Streakers Ball)
But the horse got more dances than Auntie Jeannie did
(At the Streakers Ball)
Who's the man with the mask on? The mayor asked Mrs. Gray
She said: He's not my husband, I'm very sad to say
And Elsie said: He doesn't come from this town anyway
At the Streakers Ball

They had a streakers wedding, at least that's what I'm told
(At the Streakers Ball)
And the bridegroom couldn't find a place to put his buttonhole
(At the Streakers Ball)
A bridesmaid was heard to mutter: Oh, what utter bliss
A slap-up streakers wedding is a thing I'd never miss
And you can always tell who the best man is
At the Streakers Ball

At the Streakers Ball

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